• Dumbledore: Welcome back to another year of Hogwarts!
  • Dumbledore: I actually don't know why your parents still send you here
  • Dumbledore: There's like a 30% chance you'll die tragically
  • Dumbledore: And it just goes up every year
  • Dumbledore: I guess that just means all your parents hate you
  • Dumbledore: Great let's have some pumpkin juice

tympanista:

*comes to meet you at Starbucks 15 minutes late with Starbucks from another location*

  • baby: m....m...m
  • mom: mama? ma? mommy?
  • baby: m...m...
  • baby: m..mY ANACONDA DONT

nakedmallrat69:

neptunain:

to catch a bus you have to think like a bus

cchhrriisss:

obsidiian:

awwww-cute:

Won’t settle for another spot

I NEED ONE

OH MY GOD

cchhrriisss:

obsidiian:

awwww-cute:

Won’t settle for another spot

I NEED ONE

OH MY GOD

menthuthuyoupi:

you’re telling me a chicken fried this rice?

shitwine:

Going to bed on the last day of summer vacation

image

biliusronald:

Harry Potter + Text posts | Part 1

markbrendanawitz:

i hope on the very last episode of parks and rec, mark brendanawicz comes to visit the parks department and hes like “hey leslie hows the park?” and shes like “what park” and hes like “the park you said you were building years ago. didn’t it ever get built” and the camera cuts to leslie’s panic-stricken face and she goes “oh fuck” and the screen cuts to black

rowrz:

getting ready for the purge likeimage

beautyyytime:

Why one eyebrow always comin out Gucci and the other eyebrow comin out Walmart